May 13th, 2005

Red Hair Surprise


I have... had my Styx fix.

I have seen "Lawrence, don't call me Larry Gowan" say "goo-goo-ga-joob".

I have seen middle aged women climb on stage for Styx.

I now know the horrible truth behind the "friends" part of "starship and friends".

I have seen "Sail away" and not been able to banish the spectre of Eric Cartman, even with free booze, and free food.

I was prepared to rock OR roll.


I was not prepared for both.

Neither Styx, Gowan, nor Starship or any of thier friends have changed their looks since thier prime. Gowan's wardrobe does not match Styx'. Gowan is a talented keyboardist, putting that talent to terrible, terrible use.
smirking half-hawk

Note to self

Jetlag seems to be worse going west to east. Remember that before you congratulate yourself on neediong almost no time to adjust to a 3 hour time difference, and assuming that the same will hold on your return home...

Time to decide if I want to wear contacts, and what to do about dinner, since the appt. seems to be low on food.
smirking half-hawk


Good party - I was feeling pretty low key and not terribly social, so I just spent the majority of the party being cuddled by beautiful women, and sipping wine.

It's a hard life I live.

smirking half-hawk

(no subject)

I've been hit with The Stick.

You're stuck inside Fahrenheit 451, which book do you want to be?

1984, for the irony.

Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character?

Not really, no.

The last book you bought is:

Anne Bishop's Dreams Made Flesh.

The last book you read:

I finished "The Wisdom of the Mythtellers" before I left for Phoenix.

What are you currently reading?

Robert Holdstock's "The Iron Grail" - the second book of his Merlin Codex. This actually ties in well with my previous read, since Holdstock has an uncanny ability to write pre-literate/pre-agricultural myth types in a way that feels real, and alien, much like reading actual myths from such cultures. I've also recently found out that there were in fact four Mythago Wood novels, not just the two I have. It looks like the Merlin Codex is popular enough to get at least the first two republished, so there's a chance that I might be able to get my hands on the other two.

Five books you would take to a deserted island:

  1. How to escape from a deserted island

  2. Desert Island survival techniques

  3. Raftbuilding for castaways

  4. Signal fires to radio beacons: a hands on guide to calling for help

  5. Home desalinization techniques: how to clean water using sand and palm leaves!

Who are you going to pass this stick to (3 persons)? And Why?
corwin77 because he needs to be hit with a stick
tryslora because I know she reads an incredible amount
djinnthespazz because I want to make sure she notices that Robert Holdstock is writing again
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moon and stars


Before I went to Phoenix, I finished Sean Kane's "Wisdom of the Mythtellers".

Basically, it's an examination of the structure and style of the story telling of pre-literate/pre-agricultural societies.

Among the interesting things I learned while reading it;

  • When a culutre establishes agriculture, and begins to domesticate animals, the animlas in their stories stop talking.

  • "Branwen" is Welsh for ""White Raven". A little looking online suggests that "brandu" is black raven, and "branrhudd" is crimson raven.

  • I need to find myself a good, readble (by which I mean, a story, not a text book) version of the Mabinogion (prolly spelt wrong), the Cattle Raid at Cooley, and the Ulster Cycle.

  • Before agriculture brings feudalism, the gods aren't lords over men - they live in thier own different world.

  • It's all about the boundaries.

  • Raven would never do that!

  • The author suggests that one of the uses of the rituals of the mythtellers was to cross-pollinate betwen the conscious mind and the unconscious mind, exchanign across that boundary, so that the conscious mind could access some of the perceptions of the data the unconscious is aware of, and to alter the direction of the unconscious to affect conscious behaviour. This is, in a sense, how I have been thinking about my own spiritual experimentation.

That is a very flip summary of a very thoughtful book. You might want to read it yourself.


As much as I'm enjoying the stuff I'm learning from my New Year's Resolution to read one serious book for each 3 fluff books, I find myself thinking that I need to learn more Stuff.

Things I want to be studying, not sorted for priority;

  1. I want to go back to jujutsu somewhere, and study a relatively classical/self-defense oriented style. The lack of self-defense training is starting to make me itchy. I'm starting to feel sloppy.

  2. I want to study kung fu again as well, though I really want to study with J., the sifu from Jing Mo who also taught at the jujutsu club I trained at in Oakville.

  3. Weapons! I'd like to learn some Japanese sword work.

  4. Weapons! I'm also interested in something like AEMMA, or possibly just SCA stick fighting.

  5. I want to learn PHP - I spend enough time with PERL, it's just silly that I don't know PHP.

  6. Similarly for javascript.

  7. Python, too.

  8. Art! I want to take a figure drawing class.

  9. Art! I want to take something on sculpture/jewelry making. I need to learn how to cast things to move on.

  10. Crafts! I want to learn leatherworking.

  11. Part of me also wants to go back to formal school and takes courses with the intent of getting a degree.

On top of all this, though, I need to keep going to the gym 3 times a week, and I want to maintain or increase the level of my social life.

So, that leaves me with 3 nights at the gym, and friday and saturday for social life/chores. That leaves one week night, and sunday for potential learnifying. Winning the lottery and not having to work would make things a lot easier, but failing that...

I'm trying to rate things in terms of problems with actually doing them;

  1. I haven't found a club that teaches what I want in Toronto. I don't think driving to Oakville a couple times a week would be worth it - also, the cost at that club is pretty high. Also a concern - when I was taking kung fu and going to the gym, I had a hard time keeping up - if I ended up being too tired one night, it threw my schedule off.

  2. See above - Oakville is the only place I could train with J.

  3. I'm not sure I'd want to learn Japanese sword work without #1 to work with it.

  4. This would actually be easier - the SCA doing their sword practice at Casa Loma, and AEMMA isn't that far away. I don't know if I'd find the historical re-enactment side too distracting, though. There's also the whole fear of not being able to fit into the SCA that's kept me from looking into it before now.

  5. No reason I can't... but low on priorities.

  6. I'm trying to get work to cover this one, actually.

  7. Even lower on priorities.

  8. I should find out where I can do this, and how much it should cost. The only down side would be guilt at not doing something physical, plus me being apophrehensive about my relative lack of talent.

  9. As above. Plus, potentially pricey, and may require equipment that I won't be able to have much access to.

  10. As above - also, I suspect this could get expensive very fast.

  11. It's only *part* of me that wants to do this...

The biggest thing, really, is the danger of overbooking myself. I'm already not getting home until 8pm three nights a week, and my schedule gets a little messed up every time I have to stay late at work, or go to an appointment after work. Not having enough time left to spend any time with the Lizard is a major concern. I don't know that I could actually maintain a committment to doing something with another night of my week, or with time on the weekend. Time is going to get tighter when work moves, and I have to spend time fighting traffic.

The other thing making me nervous is the social aspect of all these things - I'm not a very socially adept person, and typically, I just do my own thing with minimal social contact. New environments tend to exacerbate this, and make me extra uncomfortable. In martial arts, for example, I've always felt uncomfortable because I just don't connect with anyone on social level, and it shows. Going back to classes makes me think of high school, which I hated.

The end result is, I guess, that I'm heavily conflicted about what I want to do. I want more, but overextending myself isn't going to be good for me either. Working or sleeping less would make things easier, but I cannot safely decrease either of those.

What am I going to do? Probably waffle and angst about it for a while, and do nothing, for the time being.
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